Happy Halloween!

New Words To Add To Your Vocabulary

I was looking through some of the submissions for new words to the Merriam Webster's Dictionary. Some are pretty funny and I think I'm going to start using. Also, there's a "man" word in there. Try practicing some of these because I think they're clever or just plain dumb... but I really want to start calling my Grandma, G-ma. That's funny. Get your nieces to start calling your mom G-ma! I'll get Marc's kids to start using it. Here are the new words:

manorexic (noun) : A male who is anorexic. This term is significant due to the low percentages of males who have anorexia nervosa.
Look at his skinny arms, he must be a manorexic. —James St. James, Freak Show, 2007

G-pa(ma) (noun) : An affectionate way of referring to one's grandpa/grandma.
Due to his failing health, my g-pa had to relocate to a warmer climate.

sexytary (noun) : a very sexy, attractive, and seductive secretary
He's always eager to go to work because of his sexytary.

And I there was an article about this one in the NY Times:
Link to Va-Jay-Jay
I guess people on TV have been using Va-Jay-Jay in place of Vagina. It was on 30 Rock and Oprah uses it... I think it's funny. There was an episode of South Park a year or two ago about Oprah's Va-Jay-Jay that you'll have to see sometime.

Update: according to a Shlog super-fan that emailed me: the word va-jay-jay was used in an episode of Scrubs many many years ago.

You'll Love These Shows

Remember last week I was telling you of a show about crossword puzzle nerds? How I thought you would have loved it, 'member? Well, this weekend I caught another show that you'd love even more. It'll make you laugh, It'll make you smile, and it'll make you cry.

The show is called Independent Lens and it's on PBS. The title of the show you'd love is called "Please Vote For Me" and it follows a class in China through the voting of a new class monitor. I'll put the website up. It's super cute and very exciting. It could be a "sh-lassic". You'll have to see it.

Here's the link to the website. See if it's on t.v. this week or on dvd at netflix soon? The wordplay show is good too... I've seen other Independent Lens shows that have been really sh-awsome that you'd like too!

http://www.pbs.org/independentlens/pleasevoteforme/

Living Colour - Middle Man

I can honestly say that this song changed my life. There are a few times when I've been so amazed and excited about music as when I saw this. I remember it vividly. It was the summer of 1988 and I had just moved to Minneapolis and my mom had dropped us off(Marc and I) to live with my dad. She was headed for Arizona (later it turned into New Mexico) with Jerry. We were tired of moving and would rather suffer being poor with Pop so we could stay at the same school for our high-school years. She dropped us off on the last day of school and I started my life at my dad's house while she moved with Jerry. We knew she would keep moving every year or two (she did) and we didn't want to spend the most important years of our lives in different cities at different high schools. We were very aware that Pop was poor and we'd have to live in a shit apartment but it was better than moving around with Jerry and Mom for the next few years. I was 13 years old and will always remember those years. They were really hard and I can never forgive her for that. But I would never do that to someone especially to family.

I spent a lot of hot summer days at Shawn's house hanging out and this was on the T.V. I bought the tape as soon as it was released and listened to it all summer. Little did I know that I would still remember it as a soundtrack to that summer. Black Rock n' Roll? Now we're talkin! Can you believe that this was almost 20 years ago this summer? 1988-2008. Word.

This Made Me Laugh

The Face of Evil

Is this the face of evil? Is he plotting against you? He's waiting to disappoint you and will jump out at you when you walk by where he's hiding.

Britta Eats

Fall is Here

One of my favorite seasons is finally here! I notice not only by the chilly weather but the fattening up of the little squirrelies. The once svelte squirrels have finally bulked up for the winter. They are so cute and chubby.

One of the Creepy Peepies (aka Neighborhood Creepies) was throwing nuts to a squirrel when I was walking back from the Convention Grill yesterday. The squirrel even thought he was creepy. I went and got a hamburger, alone. I've been a little miserable from being stuffed up. I keep forgetting I have allergy problems a couple weeks in the spring and fall. They're much easier to deal with now that I don't smoke. I got some Tylenol and Claratin from Target last week and take one when I'm feeling sinus pressure and eat stuffiness. They work because last night I had the biggest headache before the NLCS championship game (Go Sox!) and after taking a Tylenol it went away. I used to be really anti-medicine but I'm starting to pop a pill if I'm not feeling well so at least I can prevent myself from being sick and miserable.

I'm going to go down to the Wild Rumpus to see if they have any cool Halloween books and then write down the titles and order them for the kids (no tax and free shipping on Amazon.com). I hope I get to see the new kitten. The last kitten "Sumo Mouse" is a Russian Blue which I think refers to it's Grey coat and yellow eyes. He was really cute last time I went there and let me pet him while he closed his eyes and had his little paws out.

Not only have I noticed nannies in the neighborhood this year. I've started to notice dog walkers. They'll have four or five dogs and be walking around and down by the lake. Is Linden Hills that snooty? I can hardly deal with the Co-op assholes and the Turtle bread women. Is my neighborhood that snooty? I feel a little out of place because everyone is older than me but I'd much rather live here over anywhere else in Minneapolis (or Minnesota) because there are a lot of things I had to deal with in other neighborhoods growing up that don't even exist here... and the lake is really quite pretty. But I do wish I could live in an area that was a little less "urban" so I could see signs for free puppies and kittens on the side of the road.

Is Dumbledore Gay?

Yes, according to J.K. Rowling. She said it during an interview today.

I hope it's true. That just makes the books that much more interesting and controversial. People will go through the entire book looking for "Larry Craigs" (references to him being gay, I made that term up)

Here's the link

I guess it is true! How exciting. I'm such a big fan of those books and read all those other books about the HP series and none of them ever said anything about Dumbledore being gay! That blows my mind. There are more details in the link.

Here's the link

Testing Your Faith Part IV

I've got a great Testing Your Faith! Okay, here's the question. If the Jewish Old Testament (The Torah, I think it's called), the Koran or Quran (I don't remember how to spell it but the Muslim bible) and the Christian bible are all similar or the same stories or even the same text. Why would the Jewish people and the Muslim's bibles be wrong? Does that mean that part of their bibles are "true" but part of them aren't?

And why would God give the wrong stories or the wrong bible to people? Why would all three be true? Hmmm. If God stories were rock songs and the bible was filled with it's greatest hits why would the Jewish and Muslim bible get different songs and why does the Christian bible have bonus tracks?

Baseball and Books

I got my "Schulz and Peanuts" book today. I'm really excited to read it. It's long. Hopefully I can get through the whole thing. I wish reading books would be equivalent in time to watching a t.v. show. There are so many books that I want to read. I've always been fascinated by Mr. Schulz and how he became so famous. I love cultural phenomenons. It's so cool how people get so famous because they touch something in people that make people buy their stuff. Also, with hugely famous things there is a lot of information about it (books, articles, opinions, crazyness). Here are a few cultural phenoms that I like. The Beatles, Agatha Christie, Harry Potter, Star Wars, Lord of the Rings, etc... I love that there is so much information and theories about these things.

I've got a bunch of books lined up to read. A couple Agatha Christie's (Which I kind of wait for because she's not going to write any more), Lisey's Story, the first Dark Tower book, a few comic novels (I don't call them graphic novels because that makes them sound like porno), a Halo book, a crappy horror book with zombies or some sort of monsters on the cover, a video game tie-in book, a few teen adventure books (think Harry Potter), and a few classics... and a huge American Literature compilation book.

The baseball games have been pretty amazing. In one game a team made seven runs in one inning. Also, three guys hit home runs... in a row, no shit. And that was just one game! I got a bag of peanuts (in the shell) and read stuff online while I watch the game. It's exciting tonight because the Red Sox could be out and the Cleveland Indians could be going to the World Series. My favorite pastime while watching the game is to watch the people in the audience and try and figure out what they're like. You can see the audience really clearly because of the HD.

Two Cats Talking

Shleepy Squirrel Baby

Here is a story with a ton of cute pictures of a baby squirrel. You'll have to click the links at the bottom of the page to start at the beginning of the story. Many supacute pictures.

Click here for the link

Biggest Loser

I turned on the T.V. and I was taken aback by a huge black woman with giant tits! Oh, it's the men on The Biggest Loser. They're so huge! It makes me wonder how someone can get that big? I don't want to know. They are like 350 lbs. That's wild. Whoa. Maybe I should use my new saying, "Uff".

I've been watching baseball. Which is pretty boring. I like that it's boring though. It makes me relax, like reading a book. It makes time slow down and makes me feel like a kid. I really liked baseball when I was a kid. I liked to play it, alot! That big scar on my eyebrow is because of baseball. We used to play at the park and hit 'em out of the park. We even broke windows on home runs and ran. Shawn and I loved playing. We'd go practice hitting and play catch constantly, even in the alley in the winter. I kind of wish I could throw a baseball with the lil' homies. I had the best old baseball glove from my uncle or grandpa. There used to be enough kids at the park to play team sports... what happened? When I was a kid we'd go to the park and play pick up games of baseball, soccer, dodgeball, kickball, and even touch football.

The people on the Biggest Loser kind of make me sick. It reminds me of my mom. My mom has been over weight forever but I don't even know if she knows that she is. It kind of worries me because it makes me think that I am going to look like her or have a girlfriend that gets really fat. She is really really lazy. I mean really lazy. I know fat people always blame their metabolism or genes but my grandma was never fat until she was in her late 70's. I think I'm going to start really working on it. I don't want to be this way the rest of my life. Cut down on calories and do some exercising. I think I'm going to only eat meat once in a while. I used to never eat this much meat.

Home run! Baseball is like a snake that slithers slowly, stays still, and right when you're almost hyp-mo-tized by it's eyes... it explodes! Home run.

Single Meals

I know how much you love cooking (sarcasm) and I thought that "Single Meals" would be a good way to give you ideas for simple meals. Maybe with some simple ideas you can expand your meals to include some favorites. These are simple meals.

Spaghetti n' Meat-a-balls-ah (in a bad eye-talian accent)
Ingredients:
Jar of Pasta Sauce (I like Neuman's)
Angel hair or thin spaghetti pasta
Bag of frozen meat-a-balls-ah
A little parm cheese

Boil a little water. Put frozen meatballs and sauce in a small covered bowl. Angel hair or thin spaghetti pasta cooks faster because it's thin (it also tastes better). Put a few good shakes of salt in the water. Pasta tastes better with salt and the water boils faster. Microwave frozen meatballs and sauce for a minute thirty seconds or two minutes until done. Cover the bowl with a loose lid or paper towel. Pasta should only take about five minutes. Drain pasta and pour sauce on top. Make sure meat-a-balls-ah are hot in the middle. Sprinkle some black pepper and parm cheese on top. Yummy.

Add a piece of garlic bread or a salad and you've got a yummy delicious meal in 10 minutes.

Chiru - Best Video Ever

By far the best video ever made. I love the story, the choreography, the inventive sets and costumes, and the tripped out song.

Bee Gees - Too Much Heaven

People Getting Punched Just Before Eating

Dodge Neon

I put insurance on the Neon. I'm getting frustrated with being trapped at home and listening to my mom creaking around upstairs. I'm tired of not being able to TCB things and finally gave up on hating driving.

I pushed the Neon out of the garage, put the battery in, started it up, and washed it. I sat in the car for 20 minutes blowing the heat and A/C to get some of the smoky smell out. It doesn't really smell that bad because I aired it out last year. I'm paying $70.00 a month for full coverage. Uggg. It's time for me to move on and be able to trot around town so I can actually get some shit done.

It feels like I'm 15 years old and have never driven before. I need to move around even if it's boring for me to go places that I've been a million times before... also, I want to be able to go see puppies and kittens.

I'm even looking up how to change the air and take care of some of the maintenance myself. My car is from 2001 and has 32,000 miles. It cost $11,800. I've got to get my money's worth.
"A real man takes care of his own problems" -Somebody famous

Nummy

Baby Bostons