Internet Classic - Dramatic Chipmunk

I know it's not a chipmunk but a prairie dog. It cracks me up. Check out some of the "remix" links too. There is a Kill Bill one that's pretty funny and a few others.

Amy Winehouse - Rehab

I'm lovin' Amy Wino. She's such a mess. She inspires me to be myself and not worry about what other people think. Anyone in their right mind would know that having a fucked up as all hell bee hive hairdo would never get you cool points. She's such a horrible mess and her voice is so fantastic.

It Took Me Thirty Three Years...

It Took Me 33 years but I think I've finally figured out how to play Solitaire. My new super computer, Mr. Kitty, has the new Windows OS. It includes a really cool looking Solitaire game.

I played a bunch of games but only won 3 times. I guess you don't "win" every time... or maybe I'm really bad. I'm proud of myself for finally figuring it out.

Also, it keeps track of how many games I've played like your old Mac Solitaire. It also came with a Chess game that I've won 90% of the games I've played. I don't mean to brag but I'm not that bad at Chess (and it's at the 3 difficulty setting out of 10). Computer chess is kind of hard to play because since it's a computer it can just turn on the heat anytime or make so obviously bad mistakes it almost throws you off. But I've played a bunch of chess games too.

Umbrella - Rihanna

Celebrity Doppleganger Game

Hey, before I forget. I was talking about R looking like some celebrity. What celebrity do you think you look like or are reminiscent of? You can combine celebrities. What about Me? Some pot head friend in high school used to say I look like Quintin Tarantino but I don't think I'm anything like him. What do you think? They can be amalgamations of different celebrities.

What about your brother? Your dad? Your mom? My mom? My brother? I think your brother reminds me a little of Barry Manilow mixed with someone else for some reason. I don't know why, I just get that impression. Like when Griffy reminded you of that girl on that TV show with the woman from 90210.

Whose your Celebrity Doppleganer?

Update: Tank the Lab Gets Adopted

Tank's picture is off the Animal Humane Society's website... which means he's gotten adopted (no they didn't kill him). If you don't remember I sent a few emails asking them to re-take his picture because he looked awful in his "unhealthy just rescued" picture. He had been there for a quite a while and was the last of all the rescue dogs waiting to be adopted. They retook his picture and someone must have seen him on the website.

I think his nose was damaged from trying to dig out of his cage or fenced area. The dogs were starving and malnourished when they rescued them from a farm. I saw a news story with video of the AHS getting the dogs ready for adoption. They talked about the squalid conditions at the farm.

He's now found a new family.

Maroon 5 - Makes Me Wonder

Adam Levine's Girlfriend on Howard Stern

When the Maroon 5 was on Howard Stern they asked him to bring in his girlfriend from the Green Room. The guys on the show always do this shtick about how hot girlfriends of celebrities are (or any girls in the studio). Howard always asks hilariously inappropriate personal questions ad nauseum of his guests, especially rock stars.

It was sort of creepy the way that the lead singer was talking about his "girl". I can't stand when men are emasculated by chicks. It drives me nuts when they do that apologetic baby talk. That dude should be f#ckin' anyone he can get for as long as his band has hits. It's one in a billion chance that their band made it and he tosses away his bachelor rock star chances by being with a waitress from Las Vegas. Silly. Men are so spineless. He kind of came across as a dweeb... or a "neo maxi zoon dweeby" (if you get my Breakfast Club reference).

Here is the link to more pics.

Link to Judd Nelson on The Breakfast Club Soundboard (Click on the Play This Game Link)

Rihanna - Shut Up and Drive

Could this be the summer jam of 2007? I think so! I'd totally do Rihanna. You've heard of Milfs? Well she's a "Silf", singer I'd like to f@#k. She kind of has that alcohol syndrome baby cuteness of that rapper Eve but even more hot and sexy. She's also got a biz-onkerz boot-ay and liz-ong luscious legs... but I bet she smells like the "Cocoa Butta" of Aaron Neville or some perfumey lotion. Wearing a sleeveless tank top with the back ripped to shreds gets her high marks in my boner book... and dem tight green pants, mmmmm. I think she's from some Caribbean island. As Rachel Ray would say, "Yumm-o".

So let me get this straight (sarcasm). Driving a car is a euphemism for having sex? Oooohhhh (in a super gay voice), I wanna ride! Can I rev your engine, Rihanna? Can I put my key in your ignition, Rihanna? Oh, behave (Austin Powers voice). My engine is ready to explode.

Tank Gets Another Chance

Last week I started an email campaign to help get a dog adopted at the Animal Humane Society.

Recently they rescued a ton of Labs from an evil farm. I even saw a story on the news about how large of a rescue it was. The AHS took in about 25 or so Labs. They processed them and put pictures up on their web site.

There was one black lab that just looked crazy. He had his lips hanging down, a scowl on his face, and Krazy Eyed Killa eyes. I wish I would have saved the photo. It was scary. I kept seeing him looking crazy and thought that there is no way that anyone is going to adopt him if he looks like he's going to eat children. I started emailing a few different people under the contacts at the AHS about taking a new picture since it's been weeks and he probably looks a lot healthier and happier. I didn't get any replies but I know they listened to me. The put up a new picture today. I checked the website this morning and look at how beautiful Tank is now!

I'm so excited. Hopefully his picture will be gone soon meaning he got adopted (not put to sleep).

Mojitos and Mini Margaritas

Summer is here. I went to the liqour store. I got some rum and pre-mixed Golden Jose Cuervo Margaritas. The Golden Cuervo tastes better than the regular. I miss working at a restaurant with a bar because although I'm not that much of a drinker (not in the slightest) I got to taste all the popular drinks. I'm going to try and make Mojitos soon. I have the rum, now I just need mint and lime.

Here's my simple recipe for Mini Margaritas. Fill low ball glass with ice. Pour 1/2 a glass of premixed Jose Cuervo Golden Margarita over ice. Drink.

Remember I forgot what a Rum and Coke with a twist of lime is? It's a Cuba Libre. That tastes good too. Also, I got some Grenadine to make Shirley Temples and cherry cokes. Yummy. I'll keep you updated on my simple summer recipes. Maybe I should call the Mini Margaritas Smallgaritas! That's funny, Smallgaritas. I think I'll like naming drinks more than making drinks. Maybe a rum and coke should be called a Roke. Rokay Raggy! Reeee-heeee-hee-he (Scooby voice).

Link to Bacardi Mojito Website

AFI List Top 100 Films of All Time

I love lists. The American Film Institute has re-done their top 100 this year. How many have you seen? I was just talking about maybe watching The Godfather again. I've been a little facinated with Brando lately. I saw a good documentary about him. I thought he was old when he did the Godfather but it's all make-up and movie magic. Anyway, here are my favorites from the top 100 movies of all time:
Citizen Kane
Casablanca
Raging Bull
Singin' in the Rain
Gone With the Wind
Vertigo
Wizard of Oz
The Searchers
Star Wars
Sunset Blvd.
It's a Wonderful Life
Chinatown
Some Like It Hot
E.T.
High Noon
The Maltese Falcon
Snow White
Rocky, The Apartment, Lord of the Rings, A Streetcar Named Desire, Rear Window, etc...
and many more. I'd say about 1/2 of the list are really good movies. Would you ever consider watching old movies? Did an old movie beat you up when you were a kid? Why do you hate old movies so much? I can picture one of your nightmares. Only beans and bananas to eat while kittens are meowing and a black and white movie is on the TV and your missing your arms.

Mr. Kitty

I'm really excited to use my new computer. It's really speedy. I've been testing out everything and I'm ready to get some computer work done.

Check out the Mr. Kitty pics. It's huge! I've been so enthusiastic about it that I was on the computer all afternoon.

I'm really glad that you love your little black man. I knew you'd love it. Take the convenience of your whole music catalog and podcasts and put it on a thinner and lighter machine with a bigger color screen and improved user software and the ability to play video! Whoo hoo!

I'm getting inspiration pictures today to work on my "sell to a big company" products going. I'm trying to figure out how to make stuff to sell to big companies. I realize I'm not going to get rich selling to individuals. Bozuki is probably paying for my monthly food budget by now. I've always got plenty of work to do. I know I'm boring you. I'll try and think of some good conundrum questions and celeb games to play. Would you give M.C. Hammer a hand job? LOL

Celebrities Over 40

I thought this was kind of fascinating. I think the whole universe of celebrities are aging. We grew up with them when they were young and now they're old. I'm sure there are celebrities that teenagers know that we don't. I didn't realize that these celebs were so old! A fascinating slide show of oldies.
Here's the link

Internet Classic: The Leprechan

Sarah Silverman: Hey Same Car

Johnny Depp Supa-Bizarro Japanese Interview

I came across this on the internets this morning. It's a little long but the performance the kids do for Mr. Depp is hilarious. I was laughing so hard I almost blew eggs out of my nose this morning. It's both super cute and wildly tripped out at the same time. I thought you'd like it because it has cute kids, japanese people, and Mr. Depp. You can fast forward it a little since it runs over 8 minutes. You may want to be in a good mood when you watch it. It cracked me up.

Animal Friendships

This goes with the cat and crow video. Here's a really cute blog. It's pictures of animal friendships. My favorites are the badger and fox (upper right), the cat and lil' turtle, and the hippo and the turtle.
http://letsbefriends.blogspot.com/

Short Rant: Summer

I'm already sick of summer. It's so hot that I can't do anything comfortably. I was just getting used to taking a long walk and listening to podcasts everyday. Now, it's just so annoyingly hot that it makes it twice as hard. I don't want to die of heat exhaustion or have a heat stroke. It's so annoying.

Everything that I enjoyed doing a week ago is now so uncomfortable that it's pointless to do. Ever tried reading a book while you are soaking in sweat? How about sitting outside when the sun is eating you alive? How about being so humid that it doesn't cool down until 4 o'clock in the morning? I can't fall asleep until it cools down.

Ugg. So annoyed. And last night some asshole had to burn a fire or 15 citronella candles. The smoke and stank was coming right into my apartment. I couldn't close the windows because it's too flippin' hot! I know I've said this before: I hate summer.

I can't close my windows at night. I can't sit in my boxers to cool down because my neighbors don't have curtains and could see me. I can't sleep. I don't want to eat anything because I'm tired and grumpy. I hate, hate, hate, summer... and on top of the heat, humidity, lack of privacy... the creepy neighbor guy sits out back on his porch and watches TV with the volume up! WTF? I hate weekends too!

I'm just ranting.

Crow & Kitten

Super Mario Bros. Theme

Marlon Brando : Streetcar Named Desire

Since I know you have no patience here is two minutes of Marlon Brando as one of his most famous characters. Is he hot? There's a reason these old guys are stars. I'm no music snob (I don't even buy CD's anymore) and I'm no movie snob but it's interesting to see these huge stars at their peak.

Foo Fighters Low

Happy Ipod Day!

I hope you got a new ipod! What color is it going to be? What's his name? Mr. T? Little Black Man (that'd be kinda racist)? How about Webster? Ha haa ha... is it black or white like Michael Jackson? You should be proud of yourself for T.C.B. (takin' care of business). Pat yourself on the back. You are officially a modern person. You've had electronics that break and you've had to buy new ones. It's a normal thing these days.

I used to get upset when things broke but now if it's lasted a few years I'm happy to get a new one. I gave up on getting attached to "things" because eventually they'll blow up... but Shuffles still survives (that little plastic pack of gum) and Buster (the iMac) is still working even after his motherboard had to be replaced when I first got him. Oh, I never named my 8 GB black iPod nano. What's a good name for him?

Now if only my TV would stop working so I could go HD.

Ellen

Aaron Neville tribute to Ed Bradley

White Stripes Icky Thump

Wanna Work at Google?

Here's a little article about Google. It sounds like fun to work there... I'd love to get free food at work and pet dogs!

I hope to one day have an office that I can have an office pet that would sleep on a little pad underneath an unused desk or my desk. I love office dogs! That way he/she could make everyone happy and get lots of attention. I think office dogs are really happy!
Link to Story

Petting a Chipmunk Part II

I'm really excited. I pet the little cutie like a cat this time. I swear. I pet him like twenty times. It was the same one that let me pet him before. He gets a little scared when I reach out for him but after I pet him with a little stick he gets used to it and lets me pet him with my hand.

I just want to reach out and grab him and kiss him. He's such a little cutie! He looks at me and runs around and then comes back. It's super cute.

I want a pet so much. At this point I'd take anything I wasn't allergic to that I could pet and didn't bite me. I saw a british dog program that had a miniature dachshund... he was really cute!

It's been really hot here and I can't stand it. I have a bunch of work to get done and I can hardly sit in a chair without over heating and getting super-crabby. I'm responsible for all the house problems and the dryer vent needed to be fixed... it was so frustrating and I had to go to three different hardware stores, buy 4 different things, and fix it 3 times... It's a standard 4" piece and nothing works! It's so annoying... but I finally got the right parts today. I don't mind fixing house crap but it's so annoying when a standard part isn't standard between 3 hardware stores. Annoyingggggggggg and exxxxxpensive! $40.00 for $2.00 worth of plastic and tin? WTF?

That's why I'm not looking forward to getting A.C. in the house. My windows are all unstandard and either too small or to weird to put a standard AC unit in... and it's expensive. Since the apartment is so wide open I have to get a huge unit... but it won't fit in a window... so I have to probably get three small units. One in the front, one in the dining room, and one in the bedroom. I asked Andy to help me install them properly. I'll probably have to cut some 2 by 4's and make shit to get them in correctly... because my windows have weird storm windows that can't be removed and are kinda tall. Blah, blah, blah... Just had to get that off my chest.

Cutie of the Day :: Baby Red Squirrel

Guy Next Door

Oh... my... God! I saw the inside of the house of the guy next store. You know, the little guy? The little guy with the girlfriend that's a foot taller than him? The guy that annoys me because he always wants to talk and see what I'm doing?

As I said he was ruining my weekends by having construction guys over fixing his stairs to the upstairs apt. and having his bathroom tiled. I was watering my gardens and planters and he was around back there behind the fence. I could tell he wanted to talk to me. He was up and down the stairs annoying his new tenant. He finally caught me when I had to water the Hostas in the front. Ugg.

I can't stand talking to the guy but I had just gotten back from Andy's bookstore and was in a nice mood because I took a long walk and had a piece of pizza for lunch at Broder's. He was talking about HD tv and told me to come over at 9:00 (when it gets dark) to see his "awesome set up".

Avoiding all the obvious gay subtext of him inviting me over to check out his "system"... I wanted to see the inside of his "awesomely awesome bachelor pad". I wanted to know that if his "pad" was the reason that he had a girlfriend.

To make a long story short... it was horrible! It could have been really gross with beer cans and pot roaches in ashtrays but it wasn't that bad... but it was totally weird. It was like going back in time. He had one of those huge $20,000 1984 projection TVs like from Chuck E. Cheese or Showbiz Pizza Place in his living room! He had 7 foot speakers! It was so crazy! What the F#*K? He had black leather couches. I watched the TV while he was saying things like, "You don't get resolution like that without HD!", "Check out the crispness of the text", "You can see the lines under her eyes"... No matter what he said I thought it looked horrible! It was all blown up on a huge hand made screen that was at least 8 ft tall by 12 feet wide... and it had a huge seam crack right in the middle of the screen! It was like an episode of King of Queens or Seinfeld... if he talked about his girlfriend's huge vagina I could have been Larry David. His kitchen was shiny lipstick red with black and silver trim... all the cabinets were shiny red. It was like going back in time to 1984. He also had two or three extra projectors lying around for parts! These projectors were at least four feet by three feet wide! It was nuts. Bachelors, wtf?

Btw. Every time write a post and see the pictures on the Shlog it makes me happy. Haven't you noticed how super cute the pictures are? I especially love the little bunny on the top with his little furry feeties. So cute! The firefox eating with his little paw... how awesomely adorable is that? Or all the little puppies with the smiles? They provoke instant happiness. I will be walking down the street and think of the little bunny's feet and smile... they're iconic cuteness!

So Ronery

I watched Team America again and was laughing my head off. I was screaming laughing. That movie is so brilliant, cute, and hilarious. Here's the best part!

I Pet a Chipmunk!

For reals! I put out a little pile of bird seed and the chipmunks came a eatin'. I was laying on my stomach in the grass waiting to see them. They'd come one at a time and scare aware any other chipmunk competition while squeaking loudly at them. I couldn't stop laughing! It's so funny when they chase each other. I grabbed a little stick and would pet one while it was filling up his cheeks. He kept looking at me and would come closer. He'd fill up his cheeks and run off to deposit the seed in his little chipmunk larder at home. He kept coming back and I kept petting him with the stick. Finally I got brave enough to touch him with my fingers and he didn't care... until he filled up his cheeks and ran to take the seeds home. They're so cute. He also stood on a flower pot and chirped at me for a couple minutes while looking straight at me. I'm not saying I'm Crocodile Dundee or anything (he could tame animals, remember his hand gesture?)... but he was a little cutie. I wonder if Mr. Bunny will let me pet him.

Also, there are two baby squirrels in the backyard. They're a little grown... maybe 1/3 of the size of mamma squirrel... they're really cute.

Baby Lemur

My favorite 'nimal this week...

Carpenters Superstar

Little Superstar

An internet classic!

Luther Vandross Superstar